A Good Day Today

It was a day like any other. I went to school, I came home, I watched my DVRed episode of "Just Shoot Me" and wasn't planning on any big fun. Oh yes. JUST SHOOT ME. But then... I got into a back and forth on Myspace with Funky D about what was going down TONIGHT. Turns out, nothing. So I offered to make dinner and hang out. And we did. That's right, folks. Andrew came over and we BRO'ED DOWN on two hamburgers, two hot dogs, and four Parliament Lights. You know what smokin' leads to. Naturally, we were in the market for some libation. Unfortunately, we both realized that we were completely broke until midnight.

So I donned my fedora, coiled my bullwhip, and started calling Andrew 'Shortround.' And for the next half hour or so, we searched tirelessly for riches. When all was said and done, we hauled in an amount that looked quite similar to THIS



Was it enough? Is it ever enough? At Habib's, it IS. I also learned that Habib trusts me enough to work the cash register by myself. I didn't need to today, but it's good to know. Anyfart, Drewsaster and I were soon declaring war on our livers and bombing them with PBR Tallboys (fuck you, Bourbon Street douche). It was a good day in '06.


Me and Andrew, if we were bears.

Another Tight Blog Entry

But first...

A Word With Cody McLaughlin: I Love Hip Hop Edition!

Cody: I have a song for you to download.

Andy: What is it?

Cody: Ray Cash "Bumpin My Music"

Andy: I'll do it, but this sounds like a bad idea.

Cody: The song isn't specia. The beat is cool. You know what? Nevermind. Just forget I said anything.

Andy: Too late. In progress.

Cody: Maybe you'll really like it. Probably not. I like it. So, yeah, probably not

Andy: Maybe Limewire will not be able to find it.

Cody: MAYBE~!

(A few minutes later)

Andy: What the fuck is this shit!? Tubular bells?

Cody: Yeah, the beat isn't even that great.

Andy: I saw that "bread and bologna" video. It pissed me off.

Cody: Yeah, thanks for ruining my life Mannie Fresh.

Andy: Wow. lolirl

Cody: It took me a minute to figure that out. But, word.

This has been A Word With Cody McLaughlin.

Anyway, I don't have much else, but there is something important to me I'd like to touch on.

The Cavs made the god damn playoffs. Oh yes. In his third try, King James has led the Cavaliers to the promised land. Hopefully they can go a couple rounds deep and make Lebron want to resign with Cleveland. We cannot afford to lose him now, that's for damn sure.


LONG LIVE THE KING!

E-served!

I just got the most curt rejection in the history of EVER. I had E-mailed a woman in my winter quarter English class about possibly having lunch with me some time in the next couple weeks. Predictably, she did not check her student E-mail until the end of spring break, at which point she replied with...

"Hi Glen. I just got your message. I'm not interested in having lunch with you."

OHH SNAP!!!!!

Separated At Birth?

I hereby demand that our own Keith Jackson cut his hair, shave his face, and start wearing fedoras. Davekwon and I went to see Dave Chappelle's Block Party last night, and sweet Jesus did Dave hit on something all too true.





Keith IS Mos Def. Or at least, he could be.

We also determined that for Halloween, Dave will be trick or treating as Mos Def while I will get gussied up to play Don Cheadle. Oh yes. OHHH yes.

You... have been blogged. And Keith... has had his life changed.

The Doug (This entry brought to you by Andy Napier and Ashley Wassmuth)

Sometimes you go into a movie expecting one thing and what you end up getting is entirely different. This was not one of those times. Ashley and I went to "The Hills Have Eyes" (or the Eyes Have Hills) expecting gore and deformed makeup wizardry, and we certainly got it. What defied our expectations was within the movie itself. Consider for a moment... this man.


That's right. That, gentle readers, is Doug. He sells cellular phones. He votes Democrat. He checks out his foxy (possibly underage) sister-in-law as she basks under the desert sun, her perfect bosom... uh... right. Anyhow, that's Doug. We (Ashley and me) hated Doug. But then... something happened.

His wife was shot in the head by a man who had just finished drinking the milk from her fun bags. And then he kidnaps Doug's baby. Oh yes. This displeases Doug. Partially covered in his dead wife's blood, Doug sets off for revenge. We (again, Ashley and me) laughed heartily at this young man, seeing his impending doom coming a mile away.

But no... it was not to be. Because somewhere in here, Doug... became... DOUG~!



Your eyes are not playing tricks on you. This is the same dork as before, with the "awesome" knob cranked way up and then snapped off, set for the rest of the movie at "11."

I don't know how to truly convey the bad assedness of DOUG~! You'll just have to see the movie. There are some uncomfortable moments that I did not mention in this post, because they don't affect DOUG~! directly. However, once you get past those, it's another 45 minutes of one man's metamorphosis from this...



to THIS.



Fuck me running, this was a fine, fine movie.

Follow me into a solo

I'm in the midst of making a mix CD for Keith, and I'm having trouble filling the space. It's called"Rapster's Rapping Renaissance" though. I'm sure it'll start flowing if I just give it some more thought. There's always room for Shaq.

A Word With Cody McLaughlin

Cody: Hey, you know what? NEVERMIND.

Andy: Oh well, whatever, nevermind.

Cody: Hm?

Andy: Nirvana lyric.

Cody: You wish

Andy: That's weird. I'm listening to "I Wish"

Cody: Isn't that an R.Kelly song?

Andy: Skeelo

Cody: I believe it's pronounced Ceelo

Andy: You mean spelled. And that's a different guy.

Cody: IT WAS JOKE. CALM DOWN.

This has been A Word With Cody McLaughlin

Time for Funky D to chime in with a "sooner" comment.





See? Totally different guy.

Hey! It's finals week, y'all! I made it! Woot! and stuff.

Or maybe it should be WOOT~!

TILDE BANG!!!!!!!

Dat's Church

I'm at the library and can't use Google Image Search, so there is no picture of said church. For the purposes of this blog, "church" will mean "good." Of course, I probably won't use the word any more. But I will indeed insert a picture of a church when I get home. And you'll know because I'll write "EDIT: HERE IS A CHURCH"

Anyhow, lesse... RAW sucks, Impact sucks, Smackdown is halfway decent 70% of the time, and... yeah... thank Pro Wrestling NOAH for my continued wrestling fandom, because it's the only product that I can enjoy consistently. YAY KENTA. That's right.

I watched the Oscars. I somehow heard the joke "If these Oscars were any gayer they'd be the Tonys" three times in one night. Fuck you, Jimmy Kimmel. I'm singling him out because I don't remember who else used it. Other than that, I watched for Jon Stewart, as I'm sure a lot of people who don't usually watch the Oscars did. Fuck Crash. I saw fifteen movies better than that preachy, nise Robert Altman thing.
Okay, I liked Crash, but Walk the Line is RIGHT THERE and it doesn't even get a nomination? Fuck you, Academy.

Now I'm pissed off. Thanks a lot, Cody. "You should update the blog." God damn it. That is NOT church, Cody.


EDIT: HERE IS A CHURCH

pottery and you

It was brought to my attention that Funky D loves something. And it rhymes with cock. Ohio St. was walking down the street one day and someone said fags are people too, and OSU said yes, except OSU fags like us, we are big stupid illiterate dummies, not like Sid, but like Craig Krenzel. One time Booker T was good at wrestling, it was when he was G.I. Bro. Ya Heard. Jonathan outlawed Eddie Guerrero and that is why he is dead. Thank you Jonathan, you have proven your genius once again. Jammin' James scored 631 points in the lopsided 632-0 victory over Ohio St. last Thursday. He had 315 dunks and one free throw. It was a long day in '68. In 1991 Nappy smuggled drugs over the US/Mexico border by having Escobar the dog swallow 919 ounces of cocaine. Escobar died 9 years later due to cocaine poisoning. Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Nappy was sent to do 30 years of community service in the form of being the assistant to Farnsworth Bentley. He carries Farnsworth's umbrella, and calls him massa. These kids are out of control. What the hell is the matter with you people. Lions and Tigers and Squares yea God.

Y'all Musta Forgot!

And then I whooped AllFranz's ass. And then I whooped the poobis palace's ass, and then I whooped Mittens For Davekwon's ass, and then I whooped Blogged Out Since Cub Scouts' ass. Y'all musta forgot!!!!!!!

Holla holla holla, look who's back, bitches. Recharged, refreshed, and ready to talk about all manner of stupid shit in the '06. Me and my boy Codeman gonna kick it out for ya proper. Nap Daddy is the sickest cat they is, and Codeman is wacktose intolerant, ya heard? Y'all musta forgot!!!!!!!!!

I'm back to school like Rod Dangerfield, and assuming a new identity; well read, sophisticated Glen, always ready with a smile or joke, but with deep blue eyes hinting at an ocean of sadness behind them. He just needs somebody to love, folks. And yes, people are calling me "Glen." If any of them end up in the inner circle, they can be re-educated.

Cody~! (God bless Bryan Alvarez and the tilde bang) is rollin' down the streets of Norman, OK with his Sprees spinnin', hoppin' from one exam to the next like he's Yokozuna dunkin' a basketball. Yeah! Good luck gettin' some nostalgic ass tonight, top dog!

I feel good. I feel in the swing of things. Maybe I'll write about my burgeoning (HA!) love life later. Peace, hos!

The Edification Blues

Writing papers two and a half hours before they're due... that's how I get DOWN!

#Got no preparation, UH!

No organization skills...

Got a master's degree in bullshitting, YEAH!

And I got some caffeine pills...

I got the blues... uh huh. Those lowdown, yellow bus scholastic bluuuuuuuuuues.
CHA!#


Me, if I were Junior Wells